10.30.2008

let go

God, why are you so good to me
even after all the times i've rejected your love
what kind of love is this
love that sacrifices your only son
love that finds me when i'm the most down

i'll let go, i'll let go, yes i'll let go
i will give all my burdens to You, Lord

Jesus, if you can calm the stormy seas,
i know You can easily calm the storm in my heart
Jesus, your peace is not something that can come from other pepople
Your peace is not something that the world can give me
i seek YOU alone

10.28.2008

trust

and oh yea God
use this time to help me to trust in You
to remind me where i put my trust
not in other people or myself,
that You are God and I am not
that You will be faithful and You hold my life in Your hands

help me to recieve the treasure you have in store for me
whatever that may look like
and all i can do is
trust in you

selfish

oh God, forgive me for being so selfish
for always being so consumed with my own thoughts
God, i've been so caught up with myself,
my own life
my own feelings
my own emotions
God, why do i always pray for things to go the way i want them to?
why don't i see things the way You see them
think thoughts the way You would think
see situations through Your eyes

God, thank you for reminding me something i seek after all my life
to let go of my thoughts
my desires
and to replace them with Your thoughts
Your desires

Lord, use this time to show me
how You feel when i break your heart
how You feel when i reject your love
how You feel when You do all that You can to love me
yet i still reject Your love

break my heart for what breaks Yours

Jesus remind me how to relentlessly pursue after You
remind me how to love You
with the same jealous love You love me with

Jesus, its all about YOU
and not about me

its all for You, its all for You
i'm letting go, im letting go

10.07.2008

taste and see

oh taste, and see
that the Lord is good to me
oh taste, and see
that the Lord, is good

you've turned my mourning into dancing
put off my rags and clothed me with gladness
and I will arise and I will praise you
i'll sing and not be silent

oh Lord
my God
I will give thanks to you forever

-brian and jenn johnson

10.04.2008

grapevine

i don't want to do my o-chem hw. i really should though. oh wells. so here it goes...

"remain in me and i will remain in you. no branch can bear fruit by itself; it must remain in the vine. neither can you bear fruit unless you remain in me."
"now remain in my love...i have told you this so that my joy may be in you and that your joy may be complete" 
-Jesus

oh Lord, how could i forget?
mom has this verse posted in the kitchen wall, and i know its one of her favorite.
i know she has reminded me so many times to remain in your love, just to spend time each day to wait upon your love.
yet in the craziness of school, 
the hecticness of ministry,
the distractions of life
i find myself remaining in 
my worries
my struggles
my thoughts instead of your thoughts
its been so hard to remain in your love.
yet of all the times to remain in your love, no time is more important,
than right now,
to sit at your feet
drink from the cup in your hands
lay back against you and breathe
feel your heart beat.

but Lord, like always, 
you remind me daily,
how when i remain in you,
life becomes so much better
and ministry begins to bear fruit
Lord, when i remain in you, 
i no longer have to worry about tomorrow,
how to love my freshmen
how to love others
how to love you more
because Lord, you always seem to remind me
and make it happen
at just the right time

Lord, when i remain in you
you provide the very best for me 
better than what i could ever imagine
for Lord,
you are always worthy of my praise

Lord i'm amazed by you
of how you love me

Lord, remind me again why i live life.
why i do the things i do.
to love you
to glorify you
in everything i do

ministry has been so good.
Lord you have stretched me in ways like never before
grown me in ways i never thought possible
Lord, continue to
break me
mold me
change me
to become more like you
use me, as a living sacrifice
as my heart beats for onething Jesus

don't stop God.
draw me deeper into your love

so i wait, for you
so i wait, for you