locked garden

today, i'm learning to treasure the rawness of a heart open and exposed to God. it can be one of the most uncomfortable and boring places to be, yet remains as the life source of my very existence. on some days it's the place i dread, yet on other days it's the place where i'm in tears as i come face to face with the One who made me and holds my life in His hands.
as i wait, the depravity and barrenness of my heart becomes so clear. it's a very uncomfortable place to be, to have my sinful heart laid bare before a perfect, pure, and holy God. the silence becomes unbearable as distractions begin to flood my mind, but i keep waiting. i wait because He is good. He is gentle. He's the kindest person I know, and i will not leave this place until i meet Him.